


Unconventional

by The_Winter_Writer



Series: MCU Kink Bingo [11]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: (wow...that sounds really fluffy doesn't it?), A little off screen murder but it's no one you'll miss, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, Arranged Marriage with a twist, Bonding, Canon-Typical Violence, Developing Relationship, Extremis Tony Stark, Loki & Tony Stark Friendship, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, M/M, Magic, Marriage, Protective Loki (Marvel), The Revengers - Freeform, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, courting, golden apples, trickery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-09 06:44:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15261687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Winter_Writer/pseuds/The_Winter_Writer
Summary: Only Tony would find himself in this kind of situation. It sure as Hell wasn't going to happen to any of the others.





	Unconventional

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second idea for this particular square. The other idea that popped into my head is much longer and so I shelved it for later (because I really, really want to write it). So for the MCU kink bingo I decided to go with this and it is a very different kind of idea.
> 
>  
> 
>  **Square filled** : G3 - Arranged Marriage

Tony crossed his arms, “No _fucking way_ am I agreeing to this.” he was a step away from _snarling_ at everyone and setting something on fire. The whole point of fucking off to space, joining the Revengers, was to find a kind of freedom he couldn’t find on Earth. It was _not_ to be threatened and coerced into an arranged marriage to some alien Prince he didn’t give a flying fuck about.

They had started off threatening to execute _all_ of them for some perceived ‘damage’ that Tony sure as fuck didn’t remember causing. The details of their methods had been _freely_ offered to Thor as the King of Asgard and, according to this particular alien culture, the only one in the party worth negotiating with.

From there, somehow, it had turned to talk of arranging a marriage between their Prince and _him_ because why the fuck not?

He wished Loki hadn’t granted him Allspeak so he could feign ignorance about the whole thing. Thor looked absolutely horrified and guilty, their resident Valkyrie’s fingers were clearly itching for a bottle or blade, while Bruce had stayed behind to avoid an incident and Loki was suspiciously silent since the alien King had proposed a less _bloody_ way of repaying the supposed damage they had caused.

The need to scream was rapidly growing, climbing up his throat and lingering on his tongue in a bid for freedom.

“ _Then we will be forced to execute your companion as reparation for the damage caused to our people._ ”

Rhodey. They were going to fucking execute _Rhodey_. There was no fucking way to get to his friend that wouldn’t risk them killing him out of spite and then it would be too late. Anything they did would alert the others and Tony couldn’t risk Rhodey. He fucking couldn’t.

Tony gritted his teeth.

Who the fuck did arranged marriages anyway? Shouldn’t that have died out centuries ago?

“I don’t have a fucking choice, do I?” he managed, rage causing his voice to shake and his body to tremble. The Apple had augmented Extremis and Tony knew his eyes were glowing a fiery, violent orange with his fury. The air around him was practically steaming with his anger.

It was a miracle nothing was on fire yet.

“I’m sorry, Tony.” Thor looked apologetic and Tony could _see_ that his friend hated it. “I do not see a way around it that will not cost us dearly.” As _King of Asgard_ Thor was the one that the alien King had seen fit to speak with the entire time as though Tony wasn’t even fucking there.

It wasn’t like _Thor_ was the one getting married, was it? Then again that’s how this whole bullshit thing went.

The alien King grinned, wide and sharp, as their words registered. Tony could see the smug way the Prince seemed to swell at those words. This is what Tony got for being _nice_ to aliens and, unknowingly, their greedy Prince who absolutely made shit up to force marriage. They had _not_ caused any kind of fucking damage to anyone’s people.

It was ridiculous the way they were both threatening them and acting as though Thor had come to them with an offering of Tony’s hand.

“ _Then it is settled. You shall wed my son and, upon proof of consummation, we will release your companion._ ”

Consummation.

Tony stared at the alien Prince, at the very obvious bulge in the alien’s pants, as he swallowed roughly. _I hate you_ he thought viciously at the Prince before them. Thor clapped a hand down on Tony’s shoulder, squeezing in reassurance.

“ _We welcome an alliance between our world and Asgard. May it be beneficial to both of our people._ ”

Tony wasn’t even a fucking Asgardian. _Technically_. The Apple changing him didn’t fucking count. He was a human and Earth wouldn’t form an alliance with these fucking assholes if they were the last offer on the damn table.

Guards stepped forward causing Tony to flinch back towards Thor and Loki who had come up to his other side. “Do not worry, Anthony.” Loki’s voice was soft. The comfort it was trying to offer did not quite hit the mark. There was no comfort to be had. _If_ he was lucky, after being married and _consummating_ it, an _accident_ might befall his _husband_ and Tony could get the fuck out of Dodge. This planet had more than enough technology that he could hail his friends with after an escape or, at least, steal a ship and get the fuck off planet so he could find them again.

He was going to be forced into an arranged marriage to a greedy, selfish alien Prince that was going to force him into consummating a marriage he didn’t want. Only then would Rhodey be safe.

Tony was torn between wanting to burn the world they were on down or asking Loki to send them all back to the ice age. Fire and ice might not mix but they were both destructive and either option would do the job. He wasn’t picky. Tony was feeling a bit vengeful and Loki was always up for a bout of vengeance or mischief.

Whichever came first.

“ _Escort the Prince’s Future Consort to the prepared chambers._ ”

He took another step back and bumped into Loki. This was a fucking nightmare. A horrible nightmare that Tony wanted to wake up from before it got any worse. He wanted to open his eyes, see his cluttered room on the Revengers’ ship and then stumble his way towards what passed for a kitchen to bug whichever teammate was awake. Tony wanted to science with Bruce, cause mischief with Loki, swap outrageous stories with Thor, drape over Rhodey and make his friend carry him through the ship. Maybe even teach Val a new drinking game.

Anything but _this_.

Tony gritted his teeth, forced himself not to flinch when a cool hand wrapped around his wrist in a reassuring grasp, as the guards moved towards him. “Please tell me you have a plan.” He said it as softly as possible, lips barely moving, as he watched the aliens advance. Loki had to have a plan.

“When do I not?”

A glance up revealed Loki’s gaze trained on the alien Prince. Whatever Loki’s plan was Tony kind of hoped it ended in explosions and some kind of interstellar incident because that would mean he _wasn’t_ married to that asshole over there. A strong hand grasped his arm, tugged him away from his teammates and towards the contingent of aliens.

Tony could see the King grinning at Thor as though they were friends, clasping Thor’s hand even as the Thunder God grimaced and looked up at Tony with something that might pass as reassurance. “ _We shall discuss our new alliance._ ” The King was saying as Loki looked at the alien with disgust more than obvious in his eyes.

He looked forward after he stumbled over a rock and the guard’s grip tightened.

_For Rhodey. It’s for Rhodey._

He told himself that over and over.

_I’ve done worse things for less. I think…_

Tony couldn’t _think_ of them at the moment but he was more than sure he’d done far worse. He _had_ slept with Stone and really, at this point, what was worse than that?

_Hammer…Hammer would have been way worse._

Under normal circumstances it would be fun to check out an alien culture, to observe their ceremonies, examine the advancements of their society and even to look around at the obvious differences in their architecture. He could see glimpses of a civilization long established, of conquest and triumph in their paintings, as the guards marched him through what passed for a palace.

Tony knew it was nothing on Asgard.

He memorized the route out of the palace, took note of the defenses, as they walked. It was easy to ignore the Prince, to ignore all of the talk around him, to focus on formulating a plan. He focused on thinking of anything that might get him out of this latest mess. The real question was how long and how much damage would he have to cause to achieve it. Tony scowled at the room he was pushed into, the door practically slamming behind him.

No windows.

 _Yay_.

* * *

It was four days of absolute _boredom._ Tony planned on leaving a strongly worded review about this nightmare. Zero fucking stars. Not a single one. The whole imprisonment, arranged marriage and the ‘ritual cleansings’ were _not_ recommended. Zero out of ten. He would _not_ recommend. Tony glanced at the mirror, took in the _white_ robes he’d been forced to wear, as the guards watched him from the doorway.

There wasn’t a single fucking thing on under the robes.

It was fortunate it wasn’t cold or there would have been a huge problem with the clothing. He was pretty sure he _shouldn’t_ be wearing white for any kind of marriage/bonding ceremony. That ship had sailed, hit an iceberg and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. It was nowhere on the horizon. It was _gone_. So long gone. He arched a brow at himself in the mirror and turned away.

This whole thing was ridiculous.

The room they had brought him to, washing him in special oils and dressing him in the robe, was small. There wasn’t a window in sight and Tony thought it was a clear design flaw. A huge design flaw that he needed to complain about because escaping out of a window was always a fun option. Idly he wondered if his teammates would make an attempt at rescuing him like some poor damsel in distress. They certainly had the firepower, _if_ they grabbed Rhodey first, but it was just as likely they wouldn’t risk it.

Yet.

They wouldn’t leave him. Tony _knew_ they wouldn’t leave him. There wasn’t a question about it.

“ _Come_.”

He wasn’t a _dog_. Tony bit back a snarl at the command as one of the guards moved towards him. He yanked his arm away from the alien, sneering, before stepping around the alien and walking towards the door with his head held high. They were _not_ dragging him there. He didn’t want any of their damn hands on him. Tony paused as the door was opened and guards fell in line around him as he was escorted to the hall the ceremony was to take place in.

It was _full_ of aliens. Tony swallowed. This was happening. He was walking down a fucking aisle towards an alien Prince he was being forced to marry in order to save Rhodey’s life. It was something out of a trashy novel that should have never seen the light of print.

A farce of an arranged marriage.

Never had Tony been more aware of the eyes on him than he was in that moment. Hundreds of pairs of eyes watched his every step as he moved closer and closer to the nightmare dressed in white and gold. Tony wasn’t going to look at the alien Prince. He didn’t want to acknowledge him but when he arrived and was forced to step up there it was impossible not to look at the asshole that had started this whole thing.

It was only because of years and _years_ of training on how to school his face into something expressionless all the while hiding his real reaction behind a mask that his face didn’t give anything away.

It was _Loki_ standing there dressed in the alien Prince’s clothing but _no one_ seemed to notice. How the fuck had they failed to notice their Prince had been replaced by a different one? Tony narrowed his eyes slightly, taking in Loki’s features, as the alien King droned on and on about bonding, making new alliances through marriage and far too many lies for Tony to bother to keep track of.

The King made it sound as though this whole thing was _their_ idea.

 _Bullshit._ He was calling bullshit.

Loki smirked at him, looking out of place in the foreign clothing and far too much _white_ for the God of Mischief, as he took Tony’s hands when the King indicated. Tony _wanted_ to say something, _needed_ to say something, but he couldn’t. Everyone seemed to think that Loki was their Prince but Tony was very clearly seeing Loki in front of him.

_Magic is so fucking amazing._

He wanted to _kiss_ magic because if he was going to be bound to _someone_ at least it was Loki and not some creepy, bad touch alien he would have rather set on fire. Tony let Loki hold his hands, watched as magic wove around their hands and listened as Loki stated _his name_ when the bonding required a response. Again, no one seemed to register anything different.

Tony’s part passed by in a haze, his mind stumbling to figure out how the _King_ hadn’t realized it wasn’t his actual son before him, as magic sunk into him and surged through his body in a way that had Tony swaying. He could feel it sinking in, locking to his very self, before it registered as this low kind of constant beat that soothed. When Tony focused on that feeling, the pulse inside of him, beating like a heart, it seemed _green_ and _gold_.

It reminded him of Loki’s magic.

He wondered what he looked like to Loki.

The aliens cheered, the King’s arms were raised up as though presenting them and the pleasure on the alien’s face was more than evident.

Tony stumbled when Loki yanked him towards him, arm curling around him almost possessively, before the God of Mischief was guiding him back down the long path he’d taken to the head of the room. He had so many questions, so many questions, but they had to wait. The sound in the room swelled, loud and echoing, as they moved closer and closer to the huge doors.

He wanted to grab Loki’s wrist and haul him through the hallways, towards the exit, but Rhodey _needed_ to be rescued first.

The guards were all too happy to escort them through the palace, Loki’s hold on him never faltering while a word never passed between them, until they were guided into the Prince’s personal rooms. Tony managed to wait until the door shut and Loki glanced around the room before focusing on him again. “ _What. The. Fuck?_ ”

Loki’s lips quirked as magic flashed over him and Tony could tell something had been changed. Probably whatever had been altering everyone else’s perception of him.

“I told you I had a plan.”

“A plan.” The words came out sounded deadpan. “ _A plan!_ Maybe next time we clue Tony in on _The Plan_.”

Loki leaned against the nearest bedpost, arms crossed and body relaxed. “You’re not married to…what did you call him? Prince Bad Touch? That’s right. You’re not married to Prince Bad Touch, are you?” Tony’s eye twitched.

“ _No_.” he dragged the word out and watched Loki nod to himself.

“You’re welcome.”

Tony closed his eyes, took a deep breath, before opening his eyes again and leveling Loki with a decidedly unimpressed look. This was absolutely something he _should_ have expected from _the_ _God of Mischief_. “I did notice that I _was_ married today and it _was_ to a Prince.” he concluded with a mock cheerful tone. “Who would have thought? The Prince of Chaos sweeping me off my feet! I could swoon, Lokes, I could fucking _swoon_.” Loki’s brow quirked but the god didn’t address Tony’s sarcasm. If anything he looked amused and _fond_.

He wasn’t even upset. It had just been a stressful four days and Tony’s body was trying to understand the fact that he had been married but _not_ to the alien he’d been dreading.

Something changed in Loki’s eyes.

“Am I such a terrible choice?”

Tony scrunched up his face, lips pursing, before his features smoothed out and he looked at Loki. A sigh escaped. “No. You’re not.”

_I would have rather have gone about this the proper way but why should the proper way ever factor into my life? I might die of shock if that ever happens._

Tony shifted on his feet, glanced out the window, and focused back on Loki after a few seconds. “Do you even _want_ to be married to me?” because Tony had been pretty sure that Loki was absolutely _against_ marriage.

Thor had even told him that Loki didn’t believe in sentiment and Tony was pretty sure that sentiment was a huge part of marrying someone, of tying yourself to them. The whole sentiment conversation had really made Tony think that anything with Loki would be strictly physical and it had, surprisingly enough, given him pause.

He dragged his mind back to the present and concentrated on Loki.

Tony watched as Loki’s eyes lazily dragged up his form making Tony feel absolutely _naked_ under that look before they settled back on his face. “I could not think of a more fitting choice for a Consort.” His lips quirked, “I _had_ intended on courting you in the proper manner, as per Asgardian tradition, but…nothing ever seems to go to plan, does it?” there was something almost rueful in Loki’s expression.

He had planned on _courting_ Tony?

Loki?

The God of Mischief was going to court _him_?

Tony was pretty sure his brain had short-circuited. That sounded… _nice_. No one had ever bothered with anything like that in the past. Tony bit his bottom lip in thought before stepping forward. The white robes he still wore moved with him, swishing lazily about his feet, as Loki tracked his movements. “I… _wouldn’t_ be opposed to that.” He offered a slight grin.

“Marriage and then courting? How…unconventional, Anthony.”

“Tell me, Lo, when has either of us ever been conventional?” Tony watched Loki grin at him with delight.

After a moment an elegant hand slowly lifted, palm facing up, as magic gathered and something slowly came into being. It rested in the palm of Loki’s hand. Slowly the god moved towards him and offered the object. It must have been concealed by more magic because the second it was held out towards him a light started to glow softly as it steadily gained brilliance.

Tony stared at it and hesitantly reached out. “What is it?”

“A star.”

 _A star. That’s…that’s impossible_.

It rested in the palm of his hand, glowing fiercely but somehow not hurting his eyes. Tony watched the _star_ as it shone beautifully. He swallowed and carefully cradled it. “That’s…a star?” Loki nodded, silent and watching, as Tony pulled it close. “Thank you.” He was a bit at a loss for words. No one else could have gotten him something so unique, so brilliant, and it seemed like such a Loki thing.

The amount of magic involved in capturing a star for the purpose of a courting gift was impossible to imagine.

Loki grinned, pleased, before something else flashed through his eyes. It was darker, almost vicious, as magic once more had something flashing but this time it was off to the side. Tony turned and looked over to see the real alien Prince sprawled out in a pool of drying blood. The white and gold of his wedding outfit stained, ruined completely by his own blood.

“Another gift but one that must be left behind.”

Tony pulled his eyes away from the alien. _That_ answered one of his unspoken questions but it had him wondering. “Rhodey?”

“Thor.” That was all Loki needed to say and the tension that Tony had been carrying in his body since the announcement of his supposed arranged marriage disappeared. It was pure relief that surged through him. “We’ll be off planet by the time they realize anything is amiss.”

“You really do give the best gifts, don’t you?”

Loki was practically _preening_ at the compliment. “I’ve only started.” And the promise in _that_ declaration was more than evident. Tony didn’t doubt that Loki would be going out of his way to top each subsequent courting gift. He grinned, stepped forward and, gripping onto the front of Loki’s stolen clothing, dragged the god down into a kiss.

Tony pulled away to look up into darkening green eyes.

“I’m looking forward to it.” His grin was sharp when he thought of the aliens who were _celebrating_ their Prince’s marriage. “Now I want to leave a little token of my own _appreciation_ for their hospitality.” A fiery kind of appreciation. It would be the kind of gift that just kept giving. He watched Loki’s eyes light up with interest.

At least something good had come out of this whole thing.

**Author's Note:**

> There _was_ an arranged marriage BUT Loki had to crash it in his own particular way. Not sure if anyone has done anything like this with this particular trope but I wanted to do something different.
> 
> So now they're going to be doing things backwards. Marriage and then courting because why not? Surely none of you thought I would make Tony marry that alien, right?
> 
> I'm very curious to hear what you thought of this one. I tried for different and I really do hope that you all liked this one! Please leave a comment and let me know what you thought.
> 
>  
> 
> [My Tumblr](http://the-winter-writer.tumblr.com)


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